Madea's Relationship Wisdom

Madea drops some serious truth bombs in this clip. The quality isn't the greatest, but the message is still the same. 

Biggest take always:

1. You can't change someone. 

"If someone shows you who they are, believe them." Maya Angelou

Meet people where they are. Don't enter into a partnership thinking, 'well if they do this then things will get better'

Guess what... they won't do that and you will get upset and disappointed because they end up not living up to YOUR expectations. 

Meet tehm where they are. 

You do not have a right to try and change anyone. Ever. Change is entirely up to them, not you. You can make suggestions, but whether or not they take that advice is entirely up to them. You can suggest it and then let it go. Release the expectation and avoid a whole lot of stress and aggravation in the process.

2. When something doesn't sit right with you, keep asking questions.

Always trust the vibes you get, intuition never lies. If someone is lying, unless they are a pathological liar and actually believe their own lies, they won't remember all that they've said. Keep digging. Pathological liars are an entirely different ball game... been there, will not do that again.

3. If somebody wants to walk out of your life. Let. them. go.

Babe, you are fucking FABULOUS. If someone is willing to walk out of your life, regardless of the effort you have put into trying to get them to stay, they ain't worth your time. Let. Them. Go. Seriously. There is someone out there who will appreciate your effort and absolutely adore you even more because of it. 

4. Some people come into your life for a lifetime, some come for a season.

Not all people are meant to be in your life forever, even the ones you expected to be there until the end of time. Life is funny that way. It has a way of throwing unexpected curve balls at you, I assume to make sure you're still paying attention. Trust that process. 

5. Some people are like leaves on a tree. They're all over the place and they shrivel up and die when the seasons change.

They are there to take from the tree and give shade all damn day. That's just who they are.

The branches give you the impression that they've got your back and they're strong, but as soon as you get out there they snap and leave you high and dry.

Watch out for the energy vampires in your life. They will take and take and take until there is nothing left and then bail out and move onto their next victim. 

6. If you find 2 or 3 people that are like the roots of a tree, consider yourself blessed. 

Those roots. Those people that keep you grounded. Those are your keepers. Those are the ones you want to keep around. They want nothing from you, but love and support. They give you love and support. It's a mutually beneficial relationship of ongoing love and support. Hug those people tight and keep them near and dear to your heart. 

7. Nobody ever said it was going to be easy. I said it would get easier when you start loving yourself.

You will get to a point when you say, ok you or me. You have to decide. 

It's not easy. It never will be. That's ok. It's the challenges in life that give us strength. 

8. You've got to learn how to be by yourself - HELL YESS!!! Shut up and wait. Go work on you.

You do not need someone to complete you. You ARE complete on your own and you are fucking bedazzling. Own it.

9.You will be surprised what people will put up with just to have someone there to tell them they love them.

This is devastating. There are two places you can find peace in your life, your grave and your house. If you can't find peace in your house then what do you have?

This little clip is probably some of the best relationship advice I have heard to date. I've listened to it countless times. While these things aren't easy. Breakups are never easy. Heartbreak is never easy. When we learn to accept the truth of what is and we learn to put our own needs first, we can recover and heal so much quicker. When we realise that healing, self work, self love, and introspection are priority, we can encourage the healing process and allow the space to let it begin. 

We spend so much time dwelling on the possibilities, when in reality the possibilities are no longer valid. You remember the good times because your brain doesn't allow you to feel the pain that you experienced during your relationship. You want to hold on to something so badly that you end up hurting yourself in the process. Meditation works well here. Meditate. Reflect. Repeat. 

Do some soul searching. 

There was a reason your relationship didn't work. Don't force things. 

Cheers & happy healing 

xo

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